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On: [[Dreams:Drugs|Drugs]]
On: [[Dreams:Drugs|Drugs]]
=====Perspective=====
The dream with the worms/larva is actually a manifested fear that you have of 'being eaten while you are still alive' - what I would suggest here is to have a look at the description of the dream again and apply self forgiveness for the experience of you within the dream - and of the fear of 'being eaten while you're still alive' - of being in a situation and 'your life is out of your hands'.
This done, to release yourself from the fear manifested connection your mind has of 'being eaten while you're still alive' and 'your life being out of your hands'.
It also 'links' with the fear of not 'being in control' of you and you world - the fear of 'freedom of self expression' - 'freedom of self expression' exists in every moment you live self honesty - but human beings 'tend to' want to control their world and themselves according to how their mind has been designed by preferences, which gives off the illusion of stability and strength. Here I suggest self forgiveness on 'wanting' and desiring to control you and your world according the mind's preference and design, and also on defining control and stability and strength. Applying / living self control is not allowing / accepting yourself to participate in this mind - but stop immediately when you realise that you're in the mind and to apply self forgiveness.
Yes - as you said, it is the mind 'grinding' deeper into you as you through utelizing fears that exist within you - which you believe and perceive yourself to be, though, fear is a design of the mind as emotion and not who you really are.
Here is a self forgiveness list on [[Control]] and [[Fear]]:
Control: http://desteni.org/a/veno-self-forgiveness-self-control
Fear: http://desteni.org/a/veno-self-forgiveness-fear
=====Dream on surviving=====
<blockquote>Before having a vivid dream this morning, I dreamt that I was late for a train. As I was late I accepted and allowed myself to feel afraid of the con-sequences and thus I gave control to the mind. My mind then proceeded to try and solve the problem by hijacking a bus, which had passengers. I don't quite remember what I did to the bus-driver, but I either hurt and/or became him in a way, at least that's the sort of sensation I can remember. Then I proceeded with hazardous driving on the freeway.
Then there was a transition to another dream.
In this dream I am with a few friends. We're hanging out, like you normally do, and one of my friends has brought his cousin along. For some reason he is not very capable of speaking and he tries to show me something, when this happens the mind wanders and I feel a bit uncomfortable about the communication difficulty. He proceeds to show me something a bit like throwing a rope, and then I get the image of a boat. I think, 'oh, he wants to show me his boat'. Then there is a dock and water and he he points my attention to the water, where I see something or rather someone. As I'm trying to make it out through the ripples of the water, the surface transitions from being horizontal to vertical, and the water with the being in it is coming closer and closer, and I start to feel amazed and a bit more uncomfortable. At this point my friend's cousin has disappeared and I look to the side to see if my friend's are there, I see one and I try to yell to him and point at the being in the water to make him notice, but he is asleep. Then I am starting to feel a bit more panicky and I proceed to try and shake him and call his name but he is very unconscious. Then I look back to the being in the water and by now it's only a few meters in front of me and trying to show me something or communicate, but I don't quite understand and I become more afraid and want to run away, but at this point I am paralyzed and facing the being. As I look at the being it's features are sort of changing in the ripples of the water, it sort of has some of the same features as me. By then I am very much in a state of panic and fear because of being unable to move and run, and I do my best to try and wriggle or shake and yell to my friend. Then as I am slowly regaining control and movement, I slowly wake up in my bed...
After waking, I am still a bit scared and in fear, I am thinking about it and trying to put it in a con-text. And as I am accepting and allowing my mind to do that, it comes up with a sort of conspiracy theory or idea that some alien being was trying to take over my body. As I am thinking about that, I become more and more panicky and afraid, and as this is happening I realize that I am also beginning to breathe heavier and heavier, and through the breathing I am then able to calm myself and get out of my minds ideas and con-structs, and thus stop my fear and anxiety.</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
What this dream shows is that you can place your self-interest first in survival situations (possibly other situations as well). Where your ass is on the line, or when there is a personal risk involved - you are willing to project yourself in a superior position and disregard the rest. That is what the example of the bus would show. Then you proceed to drive hazardous on the freeway = risking others (the common good) for your own self interest (getting somewhere on time).
Letting fear move you to do things that are not best for all.
Being uncomfortable with someone who is not very well in communicating, shows your own uncomfortability within yourself, which you would feel when you perceive yourself to for example not communicate effectively. Or this can be regards other points that you judge as "inferior", or "awkward". Because if you look at it, there is no need to feel uncomfortable. It is something you allow within yourself based on certain thoughts you have (which you have to check out).
The other part is being afraid of the unknown, or things you dont know about. Placing it as superior to yourself and letting fear direct you. And fear in your life, will indeed paralyze you, make you become stiff and uncaring, not taking chances and staying within the safe zone. Or running from challenges.
After waking, I am still a bit scared and in fear, I am thinking about it and trying to put it in a con-text. And as I am accepting and allowing my mind to do that, it comes up with a sort of conspiracy theory or idea that some alien being was trying to take over my body. As I am thinking about that, I become more and more panicky and afraid, and as this is happening I realize that I am also beginning to breathe heavier and heavier, and through the breathing I am then able to calm myself and get out of my minds ideas and constructs, and thus stop my fear and anxiety.
And by moving yourself, you can regain self-direction and actually start moving again. Which is what we have to do within our lives when facing the things we fear.
=====Dream about father=====
<blockquote>Oh my fucking god I just got into a fight where I killed my father. It was a dream and somehow my father and I got into a fight about rattlesnakes. I was talking about how cool they were or something and my father starts saying “stay away from snakes” and I’m like “that’s not the point” and my father interprets that as “you’re wrong” and “refuses to re-consider” and resists that in himself by saying “no I’m right, you’re wrong, you stay away from snakes”-- and then suddenly “I am the one who is wrong” and I am suddenly copying my father-- then we’re fighting-- it got to a point where my father attacked me- he came at me in single-minded, focused fury and punched me right in the throat- we fought, and in the fighting my father took a picture of me and my sister as infants and punched each of the images in the throat- it left a little mark on each of the pictures where we had been hit in the throat. Like, as if by attacking the photo he was attacking us. I then broke both my father’s wrists and punched him in the throat and killed him. I was not expecting my father to die, but when he did not get up I thought that he was dead. He was in his underwear. It had been very hard to hurt him because his body was so much bigger than me. I was fearful about getting in trouble for killing him, so I was relieved to have the “photo that he had attacked”- because it seemed to me like this was proof of the depravity of my father’s behavior and would justify to others what I had done. (oddly, the photo was not like “a family photo- it was like “a magazine catalouge”- the background was a solid blue color, and my sister and I as infants were side-by-side as if we were each a separate image placed next to each other to model (each of us) a pair of infant-underwear. There were 4 images that my father “attacked/ marked” in total- I only mentioned the two earlier because that was all I was certain of. I think there was an image of my mother involved in that somehow. Like one of the two other images was of her as a teenager.)
-My father “attacking me”: This is a clear reference to a time when my father punched me in the sternum onetme. His “focused fury” in the dream is a clear and direct recreation of that incident when he attacked me like that. I have thought to myself in the past: “Well at least it was in the sternum. Maybe he didn’t really even want to hurt me because he hit me in the ‘most guarded spot’ on my body. -When practicing martial arts, several months later and much more recently, I have practiced striking at the throat; I always imagine myself attacking someone much bigger than me and the throat/ neck is an easy place to guarantee instant damage. -Apparently I am attacking my father when I practice martial arts. I have not noticed that before. I remember the moment where I first started to lift weights/ workout/ bodybuild- I remember what I was seeing with my eyes and what I was thinking: I was looking at these double doors in my mother’s house- and I was thinking “Should I do this? Isn’t it really self-absorbed, arrogant and insecure? Should I really go into this?” --what “made up my mind” was the thought of “me being able to “beat back” my father if he ever hit me again.” Self-pity and self-infatuation got me and I went into it, resulting later on in significant eating disorders.</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
So in essence in the dream you're fighting against yourself as the idea and belief you're still holding and not actually self forgiving of yourself towards your father - a pointer to understand when one has been abused by parents is to realize that they certainly don't know what they are/were doing, they were programmed to do that and we have to self forgive unconditionally to actually let go. What I see in this dream about killing is not so much the idea of actually having 'him' dead but finally killing that idea/belief you are still holding a grudge on to as your father - which has been a constant dwelling throughout your process - and I say 'which' because it's simply the entire point he represents: you fighting against you as everything that you judge about him is also ourselves - anything we judge about others is us as well - hence the importance of self forgive and let go. The 'Letting Go' is the death part - finally having the opportunity to get rid of it, to end the constant battle against yourself as the idea you've held against your father and that's it.
Rattle snake reminded me of the animal support stuff back then wherein I had that 'animal support' and Bernard described it as 'Rattling the cages of the caged' which means actually daring to get ourselves out of our self-created jail - your father has become that point of limitation which keeps you locked in to your entire self-definition. Hence the coolness of this dream wherein you can simply say I am able to do this through stopping my eternal grudge against my father and stand up clear, self forgive and let go.
From here I suggest looking at where and how you could still be directing points in your world 'just to not be like your father' which is what ALL human beings go around thinking as constant ingrained fear of 'not becoming like our parents'. So this time, we have to literally simply let go of that preprogrammed link of father-son and the conflict of becoming them to realize we are definitely able and capable of directing ourselves to become that which is best for all and not continuing the same patterns - which in resisting them would simply fuel the entire point so you would then in fact end up becoming like him/ or anyone else for that matter that you could contain information from.
So that's about acting in Self-Direction, Self-Will to not simply act out of spitefulness, vengeance or opposition which is only creating the polarity and thus perpetuating the same bs.
<blockquote>"so for all the words I will speak its really useless because I'm not placing the words with the intention to support myself in living practicallity, but am just "entrenching' myself in this energetic personality-machine so I can delude myself into believing I am separate from and protected from these forms of energetic abuse (self-judgment, fear, inferiority, supression, superiority, justification, denial, delusion, dishonesty) I am allowing to exist as myself"</blockquote>
See how you KNOW what you are doing yet you still believe yourself to not be capable of seeing this for yourself. I can assure you you are aware of what I just wrote above, it's just a matter of living it - as we've discussed previously as well.
So stop entrenching yourself in this self-belief of not being able to support yourself and simply continuing deluding yourself. So see how you say 'believe yourself to be protected' - we only require protection when we are already accepting the fear as ourselves - thus realize that you are doing within that the same as 'resisting becoming like your father', just acting out the constant polarity in friction which ends up simply in you locking yourself down in those actual judgments, suppressions, justifications etc. You allow it, now it's simply time to let go of them.
That's how Death means Re-Birth as well - re-birthing yourself now without the entire huge-ghost that you've created of your father - ghost because it's simply the ideal you've kept of him holding you down.
I'd say the day you stop seeing your father as your eternal enemy, you'll start seeing how obvious it is that you have only been fighting yourself, that you can actually stop and start from scratch building yourself now without having that constant pre-configuration of the family construct -specifically related to father - loaded as 'who you are'.
We can only fight ourselves, we can only spite ourselves, we can only abuse ourselves when believing to be antagonizing anything/anyone.
=====Dream on drugs=====
<blockquote>I have had a couple dreams were I have been smoking weed in my dreams and I can't remember specifics of the dreams just that I was smoking weed. I also woke up with morning wood. So I remember in the dream I was in a big parking lot by a fast-food place. With a couple of friends from my past, and eventually we got inside one of the fast food places and it was like this chill lounge. I remember there was someone having sex on the couch under a large blanket. Also I don't remember eating a cookie in the dream and I have been staying away from sugary stuff lately. I can't remember when I smoked weed in the dream all I remember is the feeling of being ashamed that I had smoked it. Also when I woke up it was very relieving to know that it was just a dream. Ok, I remember kind of what happened it was like I got possessed in my dream and smoked weed then after I had done it, I was like WTF why did I do that?</blockquote>
<blockquote>And all I remember in regards to smoking weed in the dream is that I sat down and smoked my brains out then afterwards I regretted it. I was Jealous of the experience the couple was having. I think the weed thing has something to do with a toxic dream. I went to rehab when I was 17 and almost all the people there would have dreams of the drugs they used to take.</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
Yep, dreams support in bringing out the points that we are suppressing and/or showing where we are still holding 'back doors' wherein we could have desires that are rather hidden or not looked at and worked upon while being awake.
So the point is to equalize yourself and act in congruence with what you are living with open eyes - so that asleep and awake you remain you applying yourself in any given situation. If one 'fall' for a point in the dream then we simply know we have to see what is it that we are not considering, not looking at or suppressing. See the reactions you had what led you to 'give in', what was the experience afterwards, what ideas, experiences came up when seeing the couple having sex - etc.
After all it's not that it is bad desiring having sex - and desiring to smoke weed, it's simply about the principle we're walking and thus you've probably read and watch material around sex and how to practically handle that point. Then with weed we are aware is a no-go for us taking a point of self-commitment and discipline to face ourselves - that's it.
This has been and still is for me one of the most important Realizations. Because it was only when I realized that the mind was not bad, that I was not bad, that what I did was not bad or good that I could start to actually Trust and Support myself. I am still working with this.
What I saw was that every time I judged myself before getting to the point of Self-Forgiveness in Self-Honesty (letting "myself" as that point go) - I had created an extra unnecessary process with the Self-Judgment that now caused me to suppress, deny, self-deceive or feel self-pity when from the beginning all that was required, was that I Faced myself in Self-Honesty and Self-Forgiveness Walking the Correction of letting myself as that point go.
So what has assisted me to remember for myself is that - We've never known or lived ourselves as anyone but the fuckers that we've allowed ourselves to become, we've already fucked everything up thoroughly so there is nothing to lose, no pride to lose within simply facing ourselves in Self-Honesty and allowing ourselves to Forgive ourselves so that we can Stop, Release, Let go and Start anew Purified and Self-Directive, Living Here, in Dignity and Equality.
Yes as we actually build those habits in time, we took "time and dedication" to them which then will take the same dedication to let go of it so, that's in essence walking the consequences of having allowed ourselves to be dependent on a drug or anything else for that matter.
With regards to desiring sex - see that what I mean by it is normal is within the physical-context of requiring sex. Obviously the moment it becomes a mind-addiction then you know it's no longer 'normal' and requires direction - yet the sex-point requires an effective and practical approach that we can take on to support ourselves - agreements are suggested here as you might already know and if not, suggest you investigate upon that as well as all the interviews and documents on sex, relationships, agreements, masturbation etc of which there are tons which will certainly allow you to expand the self forgiveness to an actual seeing of what such desire is and represents.
So, suggest to take point by point as they go emerging for you to start working on = take it easy.
We can simply make of sex a point of self support, not a point of self abuse and to walk it as a point of self expression instead of it being a mind obsession. That requires practical application which I suggest you take on once you've walked alone as yourself to get yourself stable in terms of applying yourself and getting to that self-direction in self honesty required to then, expand on to other points.
=====Dream on asserting oneself=====
<blockquote>I was dreaming of telling people off, saying things to people very directly- assertively to my mother, father, sister, son's girlfriend etc. the words I say stay in the memory all day such as "I know what your doing, yes such n such I can see what you are doing...very clever" or "don't you dare speak to me like that, I have had enough of this shit"
Last night I dreamed I was in a dormitory, a strange place, in bed sleeping, half aware of strangers coming in mid way through the night and this man got into the bed next to mine. Even though I was "asleep" another part of me was watching him as though awake....he reached his hand over to pull the cover off my face and I woke up and in the pattern of all my dreams these nights I began to tell him off...and the words stayed with me, I was saying to him " Hey what are you doing, I was asleep! I was asleep....Why on earth would you wake up the one person who was successfully asleep ?"</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
What I found within the dreams are points that I'm either not standing clear within myself yet meaning points that i'm back chatting during the day and not yet directed and thus remain "confuse" or points that assisting and supporting me with showing me through others what is that i believe i'm lacking. for example, when i dream about a person i ask myself, what this person symbolize/represent to me? What is that I'm jealous of? What is that i believe i can't do while the other can? Where is it that i experience myself as lacking?
What you are showing in your dream is your desire to stand up. is this where you believe you are lacking?
Are you experiencing yourself as inferior to "mother, father, sister, son's girlfriend etc"? Because in your dream you project superiority and in 'reality' you are inferior to them so your dream shows you that you exist within and as a polarity of inferior/superior.
So what you can do is to expend on the dream within writing - describe also your experience after awaking up and facing the people that were on your dream. see if you are able to bring the dream/memory here and write -
What it gives to self when standing up to those people, How do I feel when standing up to those people, how those it make me feel to NOT stand up to people and so on.
=====Dream with various elements=====
<blockquote>I came home from work and was a little bit tired and decided that i wanted to go to sleep for a while.
Then i started to dream, i dreamed first scene was i was in a car driving somewhere, and i am saying driving here, but it is more like someone is driving and i am all over the place, but yet i am driving in the mountains,and it looked cold, but didn't felt cold. Then it started to rain.
And the scene change, suddenly i was like in a bay. And there was a great bridge in the middle of the bay but the odd thing about the bridge is one could not see the beginning nor the end of the bridge, one just assume that is must be connected to some land somewhere.
I can remember being all over this bay, and when i say ''all over'' i mean like in a hovering position, like i can see all things in different positions and can be everywhere at will.
There was a bear that could talk and had a fishing line and was trying to fish but didn't know how. And i could see as he was playing with this line, a shark approaching, the great white shark. And it was a huge one, i mean really big. when looked from above, the position i was looking at all this, the body of that shark took the whole center of the bay, and the bay was big. And the shark just took the line in its mouth but on its face i could see and sense somehow, that it was somehow playing with this bear, but yet i felt afraid and the shark came out with halve its body on the water and i told the bear; 'look you got a shark on the line man..!!'
Then i found myself on the beach with the bear and there was a young boy next to him and i can sense me being the young boy, but yet i am still in the hovering position. It's strange.
Then the dream changed again and i found myself looking at a stranger in a car driving and it felt like i was in a commercial, and it was about people who were talking about their experience of  being in a foreign country and renting a car and just drive off and explore the place. But it felt strange because i could be in the car as well as out of the car and yet feel the warmth of being in the car when i am out the car, like i didn't left the man in the car but yet i am out, i could be wherever i wanted to be....in front of the car and in the back and above it, all while it is moving, i could go and see ahead what was lying ahead on the road, but yet i am with this man in this commercial like scene. And when the man talked to himself i could hear what he was saying within me, it is like me talking to myself, but yet i was not that man,it felt strange. everything was very personal, all the scenes in the dream..........how should i put it....??  i felt like i am all that the dream was, but yet i am not. And i was also aware of me being the observer in the dream, but couldn't get it, what the observer is, you feel things like you feel with your human body, but yet i just know that i have no body, i am just all over the place and can be everywhere all over the place at will.
And everything happened like at night,but yet the night was not really dark as usual, as one would consider a night moment to be, it was like foggy. Like it is on the brink of morning, the morning sunlight is coming but not yet, and there is this semi-darkness look to it.
So what does this dream tell me..??
In this dream i had the realization of the dream, or that dreams are me, this is clear to me now, this is exactly how it felt, that the dreams i dream are me, not that i am having dreams, but the whole dream is me, but yet there is this sense of me not being the dream, but this sense of me not being the dream is not clear, it is foggy...</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
What I did with one of my latest dreams was to walk through it step by step
I wrote out the sequences of the dream in lines on top of each other and also in a sequential order, because I realized that the sequences "occurred" as reactions to each other, same as within the mind with thoughts and reactions, yet within the dream manifested as "physical projection" as "symbols".
That was Assisting me to see "who" I was within the dream as all the symbols represented there. Then I placed myself into each line - looking at what each symbol "represented" either to me personally or as "world symbol" that I had accepted as specifically symbolic.
After that I wrote this all out meaning writing the dream out with this new understanding of the symbols that I had created within the dream.
At last I did what is probably the most important and that has also been suggested here in the dream threads on the forum - which is to walk through the dream again and Correct and align myself to Self-Honesty, Common Sense and What is Best for All.
The night after I had another dream wherein the same symbols were present, yet even more explicit, so after that I wrote a document about it and also Applied Self-Forgiveness on the points that came up.
Here is an example of how I would deconstruct the dream:
i was in a car - What does a car represent/represent to me? Who am I as a car? - so for example: How I see myself moving in my life/my process? - or is it car merely as "transportation" - How does this symbol relate to where I am at the moment?
driving somewhere
like someone is driving - How do I experience that someone else is "driving me"?
i am all over the place - How do I experience myself "all over the place" - in the dream and in my daily experiences of and as myself?)
i am driving in the mountains - How do I see mountains? Does it represent "adventure"? or "climbing up"? What is it I am busy "climbing"? within the mind/my ideas/beliefs/self-definitions/experiences
it looked cold, but didn't felt cold - What does "cold" represent to me? How did I experience myself?
it started to rain. What does rain represent? (for example in many dream-analysis water represents emotions
scene change - How do I see this scene change - How did I get from the first to the second scene? Did something happen in between? Is there a connection between the two scenes?
i was like in a bay - again water
there was a great bridge in the middle of the bay - lol - "water over the bridge" - What does a bridge represent?
For example: If water is emotions, when what is the bridge? How am I "bridging" my emotions?
the odd thing - do you see it as not now observing the dream or in the dream? How did I experience the bridge?
one could not see the beginning nor the end of the bridge
one just assume that is must be connected to some land somewhere - Is it you observing the dream? Or in the dream?
being all over this bay like in a hovering position - What does it mean to be "in a hovering position" - how do I see myself being/doing this in my everyday life/in relation to this point?
i can see all things in different positions
be everywhere at will - How do I experience this in the dream?
there was a bear that could talk - What does a bear represent? - Who am I as the bear? Do I have any associations to bears?
had a fishing line - what does the fishing-line represent if the water is emotion?
was trying to fish - What am I trying to do?
didn't know how. - What is it I experience that I don't know how to do?
...and so forth. And then after I have answered this for myself. I write the new context of my understanding of "who" I am within the dream.
"This dream reveals to me the point where I...."
=====Dream on innocence (part 1)=====
<blockquote>Innocence cannot be Broken or fixed with Self-Judgment.
We were on a field on the Desteni farm, everyone was there. I had a mango in my hand and fed it to a seagull. In the moment of throwing it to the seagull I thought about the seed inside the mango and if I should have not thrown the mango to the bird. In that moment the bird broke its beak on the mango and the image of the bird with the broken beak was horrific, similar to seeing a very violent and graphic scene in a movie – I was in absolute shock and immediately felt extensive guilt and shame for having been inconsiderate. E came and said that now we had to take the bird in so that we could support it because it would not be able to take care of itself. I was seeing all these pieces of beak lying on the ground and in desperation suggested/thought that we could glue it back together onto the birds beak. E was clearly irritated with me and expressed that I was no help (in my state). I felt useless and worthless and inferior in that moment. E told me to go and get seeds so that we could catch the bird. I went to get seeds (here the dream diverted into another point that I will not add here as it is not relevant for this specific context) in my room and when I got there, I could not find the right seeds. I had lots of seeds but I could not find the right ones that E had asked me to get. I looked and looked and in the end decided to take a mix of seeds that could work. (I heard B and M talk in the background about seeds and that when we came home from the farm that we should plant seeds and that this was our responsibility and what was best for all – I experienced them as strict and the planting of seeds as an obligation with pressure and that I would probably not do it. I thought to myself that I had planted seeds last time I went home from the farm but the plants died. When I came back to E, she said that a night had passed while I was gone and the bird had died because it was left alone with the wild animals.</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
I very often dream about animals and they represent Life, Process, Innocence and Purity to me, both in my daily life and in dreams. The seagull is a specific symbol because I have connected an energetic relationship to them. Everyday I see them flying outside my house, playing with the wind, expressing themselves in freedom – is what I see. Furthermore the dream is not about something literal, but is revealing a specific interpretation of and relationship with reality and myself that I have created and living in, in and as the mind. So the first point is the polarity of animals as Innocence that I experience and believe myself to be Separate and Excluded from – the next point is how I see/experience/accept myself within and in relation to this perception. First there is my perception of Process of Life as Innocence (in this specific case) – and also as a polarity to that, as my Responsibility, as vulnerable as weak – then there is the desire to feed/support this Point, wherein I rush and do not Consider all relevant Points with the result that I Break/Fall within and lose Innocence – to this I react within fear/shame/guilt/inferiority and self-judgment and Allow this to Direct me to try to fix what is apparently “broken” – I Accept myself as completely inferior to the Self-Judgment and thus it becomes the Directive Principle that “shows me” how to fix the situation. Then I have to go get the seeds, which Viktor and I had a long discussion about and which I still do not see clearly what represents. We talked about knowledge and information or opportunity. I could also be the tools of Process that we utilize to Bring ourselves Back to Innocence. I then cannot find the right tools – because my Starting-Point is based on guilt and fear and my Direction is based on Self-Judgment – Then there is the middle-segment where I confirm my worthlessness and Acceptance thereof (again through seeing everything through self-judgment) I comparison with how I believe I should be, but am not, as strict honor that I perceive as a pressure of obligation to “plant the seeds” – (This is referring to my perception of myself since I returned from the farm. And the point of the dream being located on the farm itself is another layer of the same – seeing the farm as Innocence of Life as Process – as broken that I have to fix.) In the last part of the dream, time has passed and there is manifested consequence – my Innocence has been killed (because it could not protect or support itself and was thus also to a certain extend seen as vulnerable as weak) due to my negligence, uselessness and inability to find the right tools to fix what I had broken. The bird had died – Instead of Living Innocence Here Realizing that Innocence is Here, I went into Personality to “fix” innocence – and while doing so, “killed” myself as Innocence.
After that I looked at how I could correct the dream to Common Sense and what is Best for All. The first Point I saw is that it is unrealistic for a bird to break its beak on a mango-seed – therefore the creation of this element in the dream was made out of fear as fuzzy logic of the mind in and instant reaction to having been inconsiderate in feeding the bird something that might be harmful to it.
So I have reacted to my own inconsideration instead of simply correcting it and through that have created an unnecessary process in order to fix myself and through that a manifested consequence.
The entire segment with the actual breaking of the beak was all about fear/panic and then guilt and shame. Thereafter what I also saw that I could have done is stop myself in the moment of wanting to feed the bird, and if the mango seed would in deed have been harmful, I could have cut the seed out and simply fed the bird the rest. Thereby the rest of the dream would be irrelevant and thus reveals that the rest of the dream was a reaction to the first segment, in relation to trying to fix what I had broken and how I reacted towards myself within this.
* I do not need to feed innocence as something Separate from me or inferior to me as weak – I can simply Share myself as Innocence in Self-Support and Self-Care.
* Innocence is not fragile and cannot be broken, lost or falling – however self-abuse is possible within acting within inconsideration of the consequences of One’s actions.
* I Allow myself to Stop in the Moment and take All into Consideration and Care and Act according to what is Best for All within the Moment.
* When I do make a mistake, I Allow myself to Stop, Forgive and Place the required practical Correction. I make mistakes so that I can fully understand how to Act according to what is Best for All in Every Moment.
* I cannot fix myself with Self-judgment as Self-Judgment is me against myself and not in Support of myself
* Self-Judgment is not the Directive Principle of me and is not an Superior Authority of me. I am not Inferior to Self-Judgment, as I can Direct myself in Common Sense Consideration of what is Best for All in the Moment.
* If I allow myself to be Directed by and as Self-Judgment, I am Lost in a mind-created one dimensional reality of Fear and I create unnecessary Processes for myself to walk through to get to a Point of Self-Correction. When I am Here in and as the Physical in Equality, I am able to see what is Best for me and what is Best for Everyone Here.
=====Dream on innocence (part 2)=====
<blockquote>The night before last I had a dream which I shared in my latest post. Now last night I had a similar dream that depicted a point that had also been prominent in the first dream, but here extensive as to show myself that THIS is the point at hand that requires Direction. I have been a regular sister resister lately and especially last night, where I did all kinds of other things than sit down and write. The experience I have excused myself with is that of having “too many points to deal with”, both in terms of writing/correcting and also in terms of practical responsibilities in my world. So I Apply the same Principle as if I have had a room filled with clutter and mess: I start in one corner. Too often have I looked at that room and found it incomprehensible to clean the entire mess as I was looking at everything at once and bailed out the door. So starting in one corner of my world, which at this present moment is highlighted through this dream. I only recall one sequence from the dream, but it was clearly a repetition of the theme from the prior dream.
I am at a huge farm/facility, it is night and I have to go somewhere. I run into a sort of game park environment and all the wild animals are awakened and disturbed by my running in where they are sleeping. I do not recall exactly what happened, but it had major consequences that I ran into this place instead of Walking. In the dream I talked to some people about it and Realized that had I walked instead of running, the animals would have known that it was me, but because I came running, they thought I was a dangerous animal that came to eat them and so they all got up in a chaos of fear and killed each other.
I did not feel extensively emotional in this dream as I did in the previous one, however I did regret that I had not been considerate as I could see afterwards that it would have been Common Sense to walk instead of run. So the point that is repeating itself is the point of running/rushing which I have identified as being Inconsiderate, not taking All and Everything into Consideration and thereby creating unnecessary and unacceptable consequences. In this moment of running into the area, I was only focused on myself, on what I was doing, where I was going – thus I was self-interested and therefore did not Consider others around me. The second point is the regret, guilt and shame I experience for having done this, however not as extensive as in the first dream. Again there is the theme of animals, which represents Process and Self as the Physical and Life. In revisiting the dream, it is unclear to me at this point whether what I am showing myself is simply that rushing is self-interested and does not support life, or whether it is the perception of and reaction towards myself as inconsiderate as the relevant point. Then besides these obvious points, there is the point of the animals, which I see as a point of Polarity as well – because it shows my perception of Process, Life as the Physical as myself – wherein it is fragile, must be protected, can be disturbed and destroyed by me as the mind as the polarity as exceeding power, danger, disturbance. There is further more another point that especially was prominent in the previous dream, where the reaction and correction of the point is specifically in relation to other people (as separate), wherein the first dream it was the projection of self-judgment and responsibility and here I speak with others about what I could have done differently. So first there is me, acting alone – rushing towards something, in the first dream this was wanting to “feed life”/participate within process. Then there is the consequence of my actions, which is where I make a mistake that has severe consequences for something/someone outside of me = the animals as Innocence, Life, Process. Then there is how I react to this through speaking with others outside separate from me, thus a point of not trusting self, depending on outside separate points to direct me. Fascinating.</blockquote>
=====Perspective with Self-forgiveness=====
1. Where/how am I rushing in self-interest and inconsideration and thus compromising process?
This specific point is related to the polarized perception of me vs. process and specifically how I see myself (in and as personality of and as the mind) as compared to how I perceive/believe I should be in process. What I am also seeing is that I am actually rushing in this very Here Moment – lol – based on this exact perception. So what I see that is required is that I slow this point down and take them on one at the time because right now I am trying to basically consume/eat the point up in its fullness instead of walking it in detail point by point. So by my very Participation in and as this Moment, I can see exactly what this Point implies. Cool.
2. Where/how do I react to the mistakes I have made, where I have acted Inconsiderate, in self-interest with regret, guilt, shame, believing and perceiving that I am compromising process?
This is very obvious to me, is where I block myself instead of Allowing myself to stop and Forgive myself and correct myself. In both dream scenarios, there were a Clear Practical Correction available – the next step is thus to Apply it, which I sabotaged/postponed for myself by reacted/taking the mistake made personally and thus creating a diverted process for myself. “Next time I am to go into the area where the animals sleep, I will walk instead of run.” Done! Simple Correction.
3. Where/how have I split myself into polarity as separation and comparison between the perception of myself and the perception of process?
This point might require some more writing because this is one of the major points within the point – how I have perceived myself in a comparing polarity. So – I have an idea about Process, about who I should be in Process, that is not Aligned with me Here – The dream clearly shows that I see process as something outside Separate from me, that I have to “Consider” and “Protect” – also in order to prevent myself from making mistakes. The idea(l) I have had about who and how I should be in Process is based on comparing myself to memory, to projections and specifically within this, not seeing that it is an idea(l) of and as Polarity, something I am trying to become (run to/feed) instead of me Here, Equal and One. Therefore this Point reveals a Point of Accepted Separation – essentially Abdication of Self-Responsibility and Self-Acceptance. Last night I Realized that everything I have experienced and created for myself the last year, has been of and as the Mind. My entire perception of… everything, has been based on, in and as the Mind, as personality of ego, fear and separation. Where I locate myself as Silence and Stability as Standing in Self-Honesty, is within the Realization that I am All – because within that, everything else fades and I Realize that I have been Accepting and thus Creating myself as Illusion as Reality – and that I, as Reality, am right Here. However the direct line from that – which is where I’ve snapped my chain – is Self-Responsibility. Sweet god in heaven, has that point been the bitch of all bitches for me to Live. So – back to Practical Reality: This is the Point. Because within the perception of myself as “ass-ending”, I end on my ass = Manifested consequence. Ascension can in this case be the equivalent of running – a mis-conception of trying to stand up as the Mind (which is polarity, superiority, ego, inferiority and energy) – and thus I ended on my ass – which is the equivalent of falling and the manifested consequences taking place in my dreams. But there is no way that I am going to (and here I don’t mean as a statement of intent, but as a fact) allow myself to stand up through and as thoughts, ideas, polarities or energy. It is simply physically impossible. Therefore: back to the basics – I am Here, Here is who I am – I am Responsible for All Here as who I am. The lesson learned here is: by trying to stand up as the mind – I fall. Falling is simply ending on my ass, from where I cannot move, but sit, immovable – stuck as laziness, excuses, resistance, justifications, merry-go-rounds of self-judgment and pity. Standing up within and as the Physical, based on the Support of my dream, means simply Applying the Correction to the mistake (mind) made – my god, is it really that Simple? And obviously get to a point of not making mistakes (Self-Perfection, Self-Responsibility, Self-Authority) – however the specific point that I see I must firstly Push, is the Point of taking the mistake/fall personally – because it is also from there, that I’ve tried to stand up from and as the mind – because within doing so, I am validating myself as the mind and thus it will be the starting-point for my participation. So – point 1 is: attempting to Stand up from within and as the Mind, in Separation personified as comparison and polarity, perceiving Process as Separate/more than me. Point 2 is: from there taking mistakes personally instead of Applying the Correction as Self-Forgiveness, Facing Self within investigating the reason why the mistake was made in the first place – and the mistake is actually made because I was trying to be/do more than HERE. This is essentially the Point that I gotta work with.
* Within taking on too much, trying to solve everything at once, believing that I am able to do it all here now – I show myself that I am existing within and as a personality in and as an energy/polarity relationship with, as and towards the perception/idea/desire/belief/submission that: I must, should, could, want to – be more than who and what I am Here
Thus:
* Rushing – missing points and making mistakes
* Believe, perceive, accept and manifest myself as less than the idea
* Become a slave to the idea of who and how is should be, in absolute separation of myself Here as Life in Process of Stopping and Standing up from within and as the Mind
Self-Forgiveness
1. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to separate myself from myself as the Process of Life Standing up from within and as the Mind, as who and what I have Accepted and Allowed myself to exist in and as
2. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to create a Separate entity of and as myself, in Separation of myself Here as Life, as the idea/belief/perception of how and who I should be in and as Process
3. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to see/perceive/believe/experience/define Process as Superior to me and thus as something outside, separate from me, that I must aspire to by becoming more than who and what I am Here, as who and what I have Accepted and Allowed myself to exist in and as
4. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to believe/perceive and accept that process is about becoming more than who and what I am Here, as who and what I have Accepted and Allowed myself to exist in and as – instead of Realizing that I AM PROCESS – I am the Process of and as Standing up as Life, within and as Stopping myself, as who and what I have Accepted and Allowed myself to Exist in and as, in and as the Mind, as manifested Separation from, of and as myself Here as Life, Equal and One
5. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to attempt to aspire to become more, as I have seen/perceived/experienced and believing process to be more than me and thus that I had to become more, in order to walk Process – instead of Realizing that I am Walking Process as All and Everything I have Accepted and Allowed myself to Exist in and as
6. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to rush myself in order to become more through and as attempting to Stand up in the Mind as the acceptance of myself as inferior to process – thus actually Separating myself from myself as process and thus walking a process as mind, as the idea about process and the idea about who I am and who I should be in process
7. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to manifest a polarity-based relationship of separation, friction and conflict from within and as the mind, from within which I have accepted myself as inferior to process as something outside separate from me, that I compared myself to, through projections and memories in and as the mind
8. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to believe/fear/experience/accept and manifest process as a “positive”, as an ideal, but also as something that can be shaken and fallen from as fragile, as if it must be protected, can be disturbed and destroyed by me as the mind as the polarity as exceeding power, danger, disturbance.
9. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to accept, create and manifest an entity-personality of and as polarity as separation from and as myself here as Life, perceiving/defining/experiencing/believing and accepting process as “innocent”, “pure”, “fragile”, “unsafe”, “exposed to danger” and myself in comparison as “dirty”, “un-pure”, “tough” and “dangerous” - instead of Realizing that none of these are real, as they are polarities that I have made-up within and as the mind and created a relationship towards and with, from where I have participated in and as this polarity-construct, making up an entity personality that I have believed, accepted and lived as myself, while it was a self-deluded illusion and not Real
10. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to believe that my perception about process as more than me, was Real
11. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to believe that my perception about myself as less than process, was real
12. I Forgive myself that I have not Accepted and Allowed myself to Realize that whatever I am, whatever I Accept and Allow myself to exist in and as – is the Process of me Standing up as Life from and as the Physical in Stopping the Mind, as who and what I have Accepted and Allowed myself to exist in and as
13. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to abdicate myself as Life, through believing, accepting, perceiving and manifesting myself in Separation from process superior to me and me as inferior to process – thereby having Denied who I am Here as Life Standing up as Life from and as the Physical in Stopping the Mind, as who and what I have Accepted and Allowed myself to exist in and as
14. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to believe and fear myself to be annihilated from process, because of the mistakes I have made and fallen within – instead of realizing that this is perceived form within and as the Mind, In and as Separation from myself Here as Life – at it is I, who have annihilated myself, within judging myself for making mistakes, based on the desire to be more than who I am – instead of Forgiving and Correcting myself in Common Sense Self-Honesty, Self-Responsibility and Simplicity
15. I Forgive myself that I within having Accepted and Allowed myself to believe, perceive, experience, accept and manifest myself as inferior to and separate from process – have justified abdicating myself as process
16. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to believe and perceive process to be outside of me, away from me, not me
17. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to associate process as spiritual ascension and religious redemption – instead of Directing myself as Process in Self-Forgiveness, Self-Honesty and Self-Responsibility
18. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to accept myself to exist in Self-Interest and Inconsideration based on having Accepted myself as Separate from and inferior to process
19. I Forgive myself that I, within having Accepted and Allowed myself to accept process as outside, separate from me, have abdicated process as myself – thus abdicating self-responsibility for who and what I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become – and for correcting myself to live as Equality Here, in and as the Physical
20. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to annihilate myself from process, by accepting myself as separate from process within and as the polarity-relationship, where I have perceived process as more and me as less – instead of Realizing that: there is only one process and I am it.
21. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to deceive myself to believe that I am not in process, that I can fall out of process – when in fact, everything I am, is the process of Standing up as Life
22. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to blame and judge myself for making mistakes and for perceiving mistakes as unforgivable, when in fact all they require is practical Correction within the Application of Common Sense as what is Best for All
23. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to Compromise what is Best for All, through justifying not taking everything and everyone into Consideration, based on the acceptance of myself as inferior to process and the desire to aspire to process as more than me
24. I Forgive myself that I have not Accepted and Allowed myself to Trust myself within correcting myself and standing up
25. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to accept myself as dependent on others to stand up and correct myself
26. I Forgive myself that I have not Accepted and Allowed myself to Realize how important, simplistic and available Common Sense Self-Corrections are
27. I Forgive myself that I have not Accepted and Allowed myself Realize that the Solution is in and as the Physical
28. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to manifest unnecessary and unacceptable processes and consequences based on having allowed myself to accept myself as less than process
29. I Forgive myself that I have not Accepted and Allowed myself to Realize that Process is Here, in the Moment, in Every Breath
30. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to fear making mistakes within fearing how others would see me, that they would judge me – fear my own reaction towards myself, when I have made mistakes, of self-judgment and guilt and regret
31. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to react with self-judgment, guilt and regret towards making a mistake and thus attempting to avoid making mistakes to avoid these emotions – when in fact I can simply stop the emotions and stop allowing myself to be directed by, and enslaved to emotions
32. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to hold onto past memories of “how I was” and for comparing myself as I perceive myself now to those memories, instead of realizing that I within this am creating a relationship-polarity-energy-entity based on the acceptance of myself as inferior to and separate from process that is essentially a delusion as I cannot be and am not separate
33. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to compare myself within and as the mind, to others as projected images as positive polarities, instead of realizing that I within this am creating a relationship-polarity-energy-entity based on the acceptance of myself as inferior to and separate from process that is essentially a delusion as I cannot be and am not separate
34. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to accept myself as “out of process” – thus having justified acting deliberately in self-interest, denial and self-dishonesty
35. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to experience and participate in guilt and regret towards having allowed myself to justify acting deliberately in self-interest, denial and self-dishonesty, instead of realizing that the experiences of guilt and regret are not real and that they are part of the polarity-construct, in which I have held myself enslaved to and as the mind
36. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself for having held myself enslaved to and as the mind within participating in thoughts, memories, ideas and perceptions based on polarity-energy-relationships as separation from myself Here as Life
37. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to fear that I am not able or capable of correcting myself – thus having allowed myself to justify abdicating self-responsibility for who and what I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become
38. I Forgive myself that I have Accepted and Allowed myself to deceive myself into abdicating self-responsibility for who and what I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become, by participating in, perceiving, accepting and manifesting myself as inferior
39. I Forgive myself that I have not Accepted and Allowed myself to Realize that by participating in, perceiving, accepting and manifesting myself as inferior and within that having justified abdicating myself as Life, as self-responsible for who and what I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become, I have accepted the mind as superior to me as life and thus accepted myself as the mind, as the delusion/illusion as who I am – The End.
=====Dream with snake=====
<blockquote>This dream i had last night:
my wife is in a room/house, a huge red long snake is entering in the room/house, as i see it, i am telling her to leave the place, but she doesn't response. so i step out of the room/house by closing the door, then moments later i open the door to check her safety, at that moment, the snake had reached near the entrance and bit me.</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
I suggest you expand upon the actual experience you had in the dream as the events were developing - did you experience fear? and what is it that your actions were trying to do, how did you react to the snake biting you?
What does the snake represent to you? is there something that you would like to protect your wife from? or is it you trying to get away from facing a point within yourself and towards your wife -
Suggest you write more on these points, re-read what you wrote and fill in the gaps (remember how to slow down and writing bit by bit as in filling the gaps between trigger points and so forth?) with more details so that you can start seeing from yourself what is it that you actually experienced in this dream and what is it actually revealing to you - you are capable and able of seeing what type of association you make with the 'snake' and what your actions in the dream were intending to do.
so, some introspection required to expand the point.
=====Dream with resonant possession and stopping in breath=====
<blockquote>I enter a room, I see Aloe, a girl I had met and was hanging out with a couple of summers back. In the dream I 'recognized' her through the 'knowledge' I had of her as a person that is into mysticism and paranormal and spirituality.
I enter the room, the room is empty. I don't know why I enter the room, there was no door, I am simply suddenly there, I go pass her first, and then turn around and see her.
I don't recall us exchanging words. The first thing that she says (maybe after we say hi or something) is: look there, there's something there. She points towards me, a bit to her side, in the air that is between us.
In that moment, simultaneously, I have a 'knowledge'-reaction of "oh man, Aloe with her 'ideas'..." and also a 'notion' that I must stand to this/fight this.
as I looked, the air, which was see-through, because more dense, as if 'something' was there.
in that moment, I experienced my left underarm and hand go 'crampy' - and I saw the point: mind/resonance possession. so I moved within myself to stop this point. I took a breath and I said "delete". I could feel a 'change' within myself, though I was not 100% 'satisfied' with my sound. I also knew suddenly, no, I don't have to 'say' anything. So what I then did is, I simply 'let go'. literally, I let all the tension go as I breathed out, and I let everything go in that moment. That was it. My arm/hand was alright again and the whole point stopped.
After that, in the dream I was describing/explaining the point (and i recall being kind of 'angry' in my expression, like a 'wtf'-expression, like 'this is bullshit with consequence') - I said that the whole-point was a mind possession, and because Aloe has those particular beliefs, she manifested her own perception of/as energy within her own bubble of mind. And because I even for one moment 'accepted' or 'validated' the point (even just tacitly, per implication), I 'entered' that bubble with my own bubble I created in that moment of acceptance - and so there we were, both of us trapped in a merged moment/bubble of belief and energy -- manifesting into resonance-possession / mind-possession as indicated by my hand cramping badly (I wasn't aware of Aloe's inner experience nor did I look to see her physical condition in that moment).</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
Fascinating - like a real-life lesson-walk-through in a dream - I experienced an understanding taking-place as if for-real, physically, in the dream -- and walking the 'solution' of stopping the point through stopping within self first -- and stopping the 'possession' through letting go within self, in/as the breath.
Then I woke up.
so:
one fascinating thing was how I in/through one accepted second of 'fear' created a whole construct, lol
The moment I said "delete" - I realized within myself two things:
Firstly, I was speaking these words out of 'knowledge', which is also why I wasn't 100% satisfied with my sound
Secondly, I was speaking these words as a point of "pushing the 'thing' away" or as if I was to 'fight it', there was no actual equality in the word as me in that moment.
which is why I stopped and changed my application to breath, where I decided to simply let go.
so it not the word itself that was not 'right' - it was who I was within and as what I did/spoke.
=====Dream involving emotions and related physical experience the day after=====
<blockquote>A dream I had the other night:
I was in the kitchen of some house I apparently stayed in. I see a 'couple' laughing together while doing dishes. the man stands behind the woman, the woman laughing and leaning back to laugh - I particularly see the woman, that 'intimate moment' of her laughing to/with her man.
An emotional 'shower' overcomes me - it was not related to any thoughts, it was rather physical and I can literally feel it 'fill' my body, like running to my head - at the same time I am realizing this, it's like I'm an observer and this is 'happening' to me, and I am even 'saying to myself' as a realization in the dream that: this is weird, I don't even know these people, and I don't have any relation to who they are or what they do, this must stop, I am dreaming, this is not real. And at the same time I am as if attempting to 'change' myself within myself and stop the experience.
That's when i woke up.</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
When I woke up I contemplated that this dream must be showing me a particular emotional pattern that I haven't yet completely transcended. So I found it 'cool' to have this dream, even though the experience in itself was quite disturbing. I 'interpreted' the emotion (based on the picture-symbolism and the context thereof) as a feeling mix of fear and jealousy in relation to 'intimacy'.So I have now flagged this point for myself to in my reality direct myself into self-correction in this relation.
yesterday we were at my grandma's for lunch. Sunday. All kids there.
Something 'similar happened' from the perspective that I projected a similar point onto Niki - I see now the symbolism/pattern= 'a beautiful and happy woman, easy-going, and fulfilled'
and even though I had no feeling of jealousy or fear as such come up, I found myself having difficulty looking at her (actually at the others too a little bit), though she was the point that made this 'sensation'/reaction clear to me...so there was like this latent or unconscious reaction that was subtle, yet evident.
fascinatingly enough I applied a 'tactic' I do not use so often: I remained within myself, for myself, and I breathed for myself, and I resolved the point within myself.
I said I didn't use this often, because I see now what I would normally do: I would look for others to validate my 'change' or my 'state', I would make eye contact and look for something to define me. (that's insane!!)This I didn't do this time.
Though unconsciously it did play-out:
In the end when everybody was leaving (and even though in the beginning I didn't kiss anyone saying that I am with flu, and Niki had said she is too) - I now went to Niki and wanted to give her a kiss-goodbye. I see now that this was an unconscious move aimed to 'prove' to myself or to 'prove' generally that I am okay with the point and, in other words, it was an attempt to have the external situation validate my 'change' or my 'state' and therefore obviously the same point as above. lol
However I am 'satisfied' with the overall play-out/my participation, as I can see points to 'work-on' as well as point I have already worked through and now I see I have changed.
During this lunch I was laughing a lot with the kids, big and small, I was laughing as in enjoying myself, watching with interest how everyone has created them-self and now they have kids and babies etc...and who everyone has become or is becoming. And all were laughing and some were making jokes, and even though I was the odd one out, I was totally okay with that!
I did not make any attempts to 'try and fit-in' or get into one of the bubbles -- this is what I saw later on: how people create bubbles around them when they share gossip/jokes/secrets - this bubble is projected as 'intimacy', but it's the system definition of 'intimacy'.
In the past I would feel 'left out' and get jealous, feeling 'sorry for myself' and about why I can't be 'part of it', why I can't belong.
Today I was totally 'enough' for myself - I didn't have to belong anywhere, I wasn't 'expecting 'validation' or 'rejection', I didn't have emotional reactions towards other people's apparent 'intimacy' - I saw myself as "in the bubble but not of the bubble".So - fascinating actually, these are quite some interesting observations that show to me how i have changed and how i stand in self-trust and self-equality, ready to work with what is here to assist and support myself.
=====Dream with Water=====
<blockquote>Yesterday I did some Self-forgiveness points in regards of light which I was brainwashed by religion system and connected to the casino. As I remember the saying from church as a small child I had to repeat that god is our light and will come to save us. This connected within me and affected me strongly, as I was addicted on playing in casino, and I was a long time investigating what was the cause but with no clarity within me, but from Bernard's video about magical money, I now see how this connect.
When I came home, I was so tired that I fell to sleep and I had a dream, how I am in water, playing in water and enjoying swimming, but then there was no light ( it looked to me like I am switching off the light ) , basically it was something like at the beach and me jumping to the water, but then I was swimming in water without light and I heard the words of Sunette saying, "fear of letting go".
So probably this is about me fearing to let go of the worshiping of the light transformed to the participating in casino. But why it is about water ? When I woke up, I went to drink some water, not much, just some. Is water also indicating that I drink too little water ?</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
Water is purification as well - though I suggest that within looking at the turning point of you standing within that 'fear of letting go' you actually place out in a written manner what is it that you see in self honesty you are still holding on to with regards to self forgiving these points as the entire belief system you participated in. Just see the common sense of it: why fearing letting go of the activity of you participating in the casino which you've related to 'playing in the casino' which in itself can be simplified as just another point to self forgive equally without creating any further 'meanings' and trying to link points that aren't necessarily linked. There is nothing to lose but simply to stop the idea of self we've created of ourselves to stand as Equals.
Thus I suggest simplicity in all ways - use the dreams to support you in seeing who you are within the dream, what does the fear represent in your process at this moment, what is your experience within the dream that is not yet one and equal to who you are when awake, any emotional points not being dealt with, is there a point of suppression being revealed through the dream? etc - that way one does not depend on a specific meaning but simply use dreams as another point of self-support.
=====Dream about abduction and torture=====
<blockquote>I have rarely remembered dreams, throughout my whole life. I could probably count on one hand the number of times I’ve been able to remember a dream so, waking up from sleep in the middle of the night BECAUSE of a dream I was having, was quite unusual. I should have gotten up and written about it then but, didn’t so, now the details are kind of sketchy…
I don’t know where I was going or coming from but, I was driving, at night. All of a sudden, a bright spotlight was shining on the car – from up above. Then, a barricade, of sorts, was ‘shot’ into the road in front of me, forcing me to stop. It was like giant swords
were shot down into the pavement, in quick succession, forming a line across the road. So I pulled to the side of the road, stopped and got out of the car. When I looked up, there were these dudes in camo uniforms dropping to the ground on ropes/lines from a helicopter. I was like – WTF? Then, I was grabbed and told I was coming with them. I didn’t ride in the helicopter – some vehicle took me to a building I didn't recognize and I was led to the door and instructed to knock. A female answered the door and, she was grabbed and taken too (don’t know who she was). As we were taken away from the doorway, I noticed a male -that looked like one of my brothers - had come to the door and looked out for a second then ducked back in, as if he was hiding. We were then taken to some kind of military facility.
I didn’t resist these people, as I realized there would be no point and, because I was certain that there had been some kind of mistake – there had to have been because, I just couldn’t imagine that ‘I’ had done anything ‘wrong'- After all, I’m a law abiding citizen. It just didn’t make any sense. There was a lot of commotion at this facility – lots of people coming and going - and we were taken to a big metal building. There was an office in the middle of a big open area where I assumed I’d get a chance to talk to someone in charge to clear up this misunderstanding. The female was bound and gagged and laying on a bench. I was just sitting there waiting to talk to someone. No one had told me why I was brought here. No one had ‘read me my rights’ so, I figured I wasn’t being arrested. I was still clueless.
I never got the chance to talk to anyone in authority. This husky young Brian Bozworth looking guy – mid twenties – came and took me to this arena type area. It was like one of those cage fighting scenes, reminiscent of “Mad Max, Thunderdome”, surrounded by bleacher seats filled with all these military guys whooping and hollering shit I couldn’t understand. The dude that took me there was yelling shit at me and I only caught part of the words: "teach you a lesson"... “set an example”... when the realization hit me that this must be Homeland Security. By LAW: they didn’t have to tell me why they picked me up; they didn’t have to read me my rights; they could hold me indefinitely; they could torture me; and, they didn’t have to notify my family or ANYBODY that they had taken me into custody. Basically, they could make me disappear – without a trace. But, what had I done? Was I a ‘threat to National Security’? The only thing I’d ever done was write some stuff on the internet about Equality and an Equal Money System. And some stuff about religious brainwashing. Was that what this was all about?
I was kind of looking around wondering just how brainwashed all these fucking idiots were and how I wasn’t a ‘threat’ to anyone when, all of a sudden, this guy slammed into me – just knocked the living shit out of me. As I got up I saw that he had this rig on that had bungie straps hooked to a belt around his waist that was suspended from the ceiling. He lunged at me and knocked the shit out of me again then bounced back up to the side of this ‘cage’. Everyone in the bleachers was yelling encouragement – to him – while he was yelling at me and, as he lunged at me again, I remember breathing and thinking: I never was a big fan of fighting – it just wasn’t my thing – but, I wish I’d have stayed in better shape and maybe I’d be able to defend myself – at least a little – cause this guy wants to kill me. When he slammed into me again, I woke up.
I looked around the room and ‘thought’ man, that was one fucked up dream. C wasn’t in bed, yet – she had met with A for SRA last night and, sometimes stays up for a while after their meetings. So, I rolled over onto my side, pulled the covers up over my head, and went back to sleep...</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
Reading the specifics of your dream - seems it may have something to do with our visit yesterday with your daughter Leah, where, when I asked her if she had read your current blog post she responded, "No, I didn't know he has a blog, and I don't need to read it because I already know him". She then went on to say, "I get tired of you all talking about the 'stuff' you talk about, when I really just want to know what you had for dinner the other night". I saw the look on your face when she said what she said about your blog, and honestly it seemed as if, in that moment, she had stuck a 'sword' in your heart.
Quote from above:"Then, a barricade, of sorts, was ‘shot’ into the road in front of me, forcing me to stop. It was like giant swords"
You sat there gallantly and respected the words she breathed, allowing no visible reactions per se, and, when I said , 'Leah, you don't know your dad, not really, because none of us each one even know who we really are in self honesty, so how can we really know each other - except within the 'ideas' we have of each others past behaviors from past experiences. Then, she stood up and walked out the front door and returned 25 to 30 minutes later...
Nothing more was said, you didn't write about it or speak about it
Leah lives in Austin Texas - we see her maybe once a year and the last time she was here was the summer of 2009. I have witnessed your past relationship with your daughter for 20 years, which I would describe as... I will describe in one word - 'endearingly'. Is this dream representative of a relevant point to investigate seeing how you've only remembered 'a handful' of dreams and this one occurs the night following this day investigate in self honesty
=====Dream about zombies=====
<blockquote>A recurrent theme in many of my nights in the past were of zombie dreams, not too much lately then last night it was another zombie one, either the threat of, or direct confrontation with, or that I am a zombie, etc; many many scenarios
And another strange one recently was that I was fighting with a dragon that I 'knew' I could not beat 'Yet'... It was at a time when I was really going crazy with incessant streams of thought, of course they have not stopped yet, it does not feel like they ever will, but I have located my silence within all of this, and I no longer feel guilty when I err incredibly, its a ping pong experience of back and forth back and forth, between me as silence, and absolute mind job.
So if you could let me know about the zombie thing, I would really appreciate it.
annexed: Finally 'made friends' with a zombie, to the point where I allowed him to bite me, and he even offered to only make it a little bite so I would not feel too much pain!</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
I have had a lot of zombie dreams in my life as well.
Our dreams confront us with who we are, in various situations. But it ALWAYS says something about us. How we react or could react to events, what we have reactions to, what we vest interest in, what is in our subconscious etc...
To give a perspective on your dream specifically, you need to write it down in detail, what happened, what you felt and what you did.
The dragon dream: why did you start fighting the dragon? And did you have a sort of "hero" complex of specialness while fighting it?
The details of dreams are very specific because those show you who you are within the dream, and thus within yourself and what you accept yourself to be.
What would be best for all in that zombie situation? To assist the zombie to realise it does not have to be a "zombie" and it thus not has to bite you. That's easier when you know you are dreaming.
So maybe ask yourself how you manifested the zombie dreams, maybe its because of a fear of people hurting you, seeing people as sort of "zombies" who can hurt with ease. Trying to find a middle road with them so they can still hurt but only a little so it wont hurt so much.
Check it for yourself.
Its very simple all you have to do is be honest to yourself = self-honest. Because the kind of dreams we have tell us something about ourselves.
For example Andrea gave really cool perspective on this in one of her videos. How we manifest certain dreams according to our desires for example. That's why some people dream a lot about family, or some dream a lot about fighting, or some dream a lot about sex, or others about being a hero, always saving something or someone or being loved and adored etc... it all shows us what is dominant in our mindset, what we let control our everyday life. Here are a some really cool videos Andrea made about dreaming, to assist people in seeing this with their own dreams:
*Dream Analysis: The Saviour in the Fight against Evil part 1
http://www.youtube.com./watch?v=RvdrpNiP8-c
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*Dream Analysis: The Saviour in the Fight against Evil Part 2
http://www.youtube.com./watch?v=nqlXOfhdw9c
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*Perspective on Dream: Depicting Violence at Sexual Orgasm part 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=67lpKH4HJQY
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*Perspective on Dream: Depicting Violence at Sexual Orgasm part 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1LOFLrNufM
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*Sexual Dreams Analysing 1+1=2 part 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=km6FwbYWwo4
And I also shot zombies in my zombie dreams in the past. Because I knew no other way to deal with it. And I didn't consider and tried another way. I simply copied what I saw in the movies about zombies. And was afraid because of what I had seen in those movies, which then manifests in dreams.
So with dreams, always apply it to yourself and see where you are experiencing similar constructs in your every day life. Dreams are often more figurated and uses more symbolism.
=====Dream on resistance=====
<blockquote>so... I was one night studying the Desteni material and also looking within myself and had many realizations. Then I realized it was kinda late so i went to sleep. I've always been used to think and imagine things and pictures to make me sleep because it was a way to escape the silence and darkness within me and my surroundings. That night i realized that and i stopped. So I fell asleep immediately.
When I fell asleep I had this dream. It was in a place that looked like one of the avenues in my city. There was this man who wanted to go somewhere. (I was in an observant position, not participating) and the people where dragging him to the place he wanted to go and they were pulling and pushing him. And even though he wanted to go he was resisting himself. And always someone got tired of pulling him and came another person to try. After a while comes a woman she sees whats happening and tries to pull him somewhere. I that very moment I became the woman and told a guy to help me pull him and he said: "no, he doesn't let me. I'm sick of him." Io I turn to the man that wants to go somewhere(in this moment I am really really really stressed out, feeling like my head is exploding, and my chest. Like a burning sensation in my upper body) I ask him: "what's wrong if you wanna go there why won't you let people help you?" and there's like "interference", I don't understand what he's saying, he has no face(ha). In that moment I decided to wake up because I was in such a state of utter desperation, fear and stress. When I woke up I felt so overwhelmed about the fear and the mix of emotions I just... decided to scream. Of course after the dream I couldn't stop thinking about it and again i was thinking before sleeping. It distracted me from everything. </blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
I suggest you look at the points of what exactly caused the fear, desperation and stress within that situation, I suggest you walk the dream again and place it in more detail with regards to what thoughts, what actually happened that caused this experience in the dream yet within you. There is a resistance event in the dream so regardless of 'who you are' within the scene, see the core events like the anxiety that you experienced that lead you to eventually scream -
Dreams are part of our process support to open up points existent within us that we have to deal with and that we usually suppress in our day to day living - so the dream is generated by you as the mind to open up that 'can of worms' to deal with the core experiences as mentioned above.
Thus, suggest you take this dream into further writing about what exactly triggered that state of anxiety and how you can relate that experience - not the events per se in the dream - to your every day living.
=====Dream about dying=====
<blockquote>I posted for first time today and want to share the dream I had that literally woke me up feeling different to before, different in a way that is ...I dunno...clearer..less afraid than ever
I was with a group of people and we were all watching a plane overhead completing some mission, some task? we looked skyward and expected to see an alignment or a completion of some sort involving the plane.
instead it nose dived and spiralled down towards us, it crashed just a few feet from where I stood...it happened so fast It was like I hadn't time to be afraid....after a moment of silence, there was an explosion...I felt intense heat, my eardrums burst and the pain was unbelievable, I could literally feel my skin coming off and felt various pain sensations....I was saying to myself This is it, this is it....I'm dying, I'm dead...wait...another 'me' seemed to zoom forward and was really watching saying wait this is amazing...I'm going to find out now....there was a sensation of expansion, and light, and a kind of conversation with my own face...It was like I was just about to hear something significant...but I woke up I would so appreciate some objective interpretation from you guys.</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
A perspective on the dream: I suggest work with the elements of the dream to find out how the dream is assisting you in aligning yourself within self-honesty and self-correction.
With regards to the Plane that had completed some task and which you expected would now align accordingly - what in your Life are you not directing effectively - which in the dream you have set separate from yourself in observation - which is on its own moving like the plane and trough which you hope will somehow align itself - without your direct awareness and self-movement.
The plane coming down and causing you physical pain - this I suggest observing as the Resonant consequences of that Pattern which you leave to 'fly around' in your world, undirected, which eventually crashes. Do you experience Emotional pain, is it Physical, do you withdraw or get annoyed? If you observe the Event as Pattern in your Life from starting point to the way that it ends you will be able to see where the pattern is starting with you simply observing and not giving it direction. When you do direct the Pattern, is it done from the Mind - where you are allowing the events to unfold in a pre-described pattern, simply letting it be as society would do it (the people watching the plane with you)? Or are you simply taking on a 'hands-off approach' - as symbolized by the plane up there in the sky having to make the correction/align itself/complete the task. Then the plane crashes which is the consequence as you experience it - what is the pattern and is the end as pain the reason of addiction why one cannot break the pattern.
You could also work with the dream from the perspective of a person or point in your world which you wont to let go off or allow to correct itself - but the person/point keeps coming back and 'crashing near you' - thus repeatedly causing you immense 'pain.' here I would work with - who/what is the plane? What am I not considering? Am I supposed to let go/direct and why have I not let go/directed.
Interesting - when I was working with Patterns of Destruction/Self-Abuse/Lack of Self-Direction- I realised that I was allowing the pattern to unfold in a predictable pattern and end as it did because I was addicted t pain and abuse - it kept me trapped in a safe place - where i would never stand up and trust me.
Here is an Excerpt From Venos Structural Resonance Alignment Articles Explaining Teeth
4.) MOUTH point
The MOUTH point is the ‘holder' of the pre-programmed life experience of yourself here on earth within the White Light gridline structure – referred to as your ‘blueprints'.
As you ‘come of age' you lose your first set of teeth that had come out. The first fresh beautiful set of teeth that come out when you are a child I will refer to as your ‘Pure Teeth'. They are pure from the perspective that they are developed from within the pure life essence resonance foundation as who you really are and actually support who you really are. Yet, here come the designers of consciousness enslavement and control systems and implement a system within your entire physical body as you develop in the mother's womb, which is actually transferred to you through the ‘sins of the fathers' principle, that ‘push out' your ‘Pure Teeth' and replace it with ‘System Teeth'.
The ‘System Teeth' carry the blueprints of your entire life experience here on earth, meaning that the blueprints as your ‘System Teeth' carry your entire pre-programmed life within the White Light gridline structure. The moment your ‘Pure Teeth' fall out and are replaced with your ‘System Teeth' – your entire life, all the experiences of yourself here on earth, is programmed and infused within the White Light gridline structure on earth. Because your ‘System Teeth' carry the blueprints of your pre-programmed life here on earth within the White Light gridline structure – the two lock in together and voila: You are ready to experience your manifested pre-programmed life here on earth.
Your entire life experience on earth has been pre-programmed humanity – and it's all allocated in the blueprints of the teeth you currently have! Understand that the blueprints of the ‘System Teeth' that are developed and come through when your ‘Pure Teeth' fall out – is transferred from within the preprogrammed mind consciousness system already manifested and infused within you while you were busy being developed in the mother's womb. And this is how the consciousness systems within you started manifesting into an actual becoming here on earth as you experience yourself: The consciousness systems manifested as you grow, physically and mentally in this world as indicated by the teething process. Therefore the teeth you now have is supporting consciousness systems as who and what you have become and accepted yourself to be – as you live and experience yourself within your pre-programmed life design.
Here is the Link to the "Articles" Section on the Home Page of the Desteni Site.
http://desteni.co.za/articles
If you scroll down you will find all of the Structural Resonance Alignment Articles done by Veno - It is suggested to become familiar with these documents for perspective on what the Structural Resonance is and how it directs and influences us in our world.
=====Dream about being shot=====
<blockquote>I just woke up from a dream where I was shot and died.
I was at like a warehouse garage sale or something like that.
I was walking around with my best friend Jacob - who used to be my best friend, then we had sex and it all fell apart, and my old partner Albert. We were walking down this aisle and this guy was up ahead looking at this table and bumped into it. A gun fell on the ground and everyone around was all surprised.
I don't know if it was the guys gun or not because he looked all surprised to, but then he looked around and I knew in me he was going to grab it - sure enough he did and started pointed it at everyone.
Everyone gasped and he started yelling for everyone to give them there money. I had a bunch of money in my back pocket and a couple dollar bills and quarters in my front pockets. I decided not to give him what was in my back pocket but just what was in the front. When I handed him the quarters he started counting them and I was lying to him about how much there was there cause I still had quarters in my pocket, but wasn't going to tell him.
He put them away and then looked at my breasts, then grabbed them really quick, and in that moment I had a flash of "I know this isn't right I need to stand up for myself"...so I flipped my shit and started screaming at him. I started grabbing shit off tables and throwing it at him and telling him he was a piece of shit.
Everyone around me seemed to know I was fucked. I don't exactly remember anyone specifically saying anything, but I just remember the feeling. Sure enough, and with a little hesitation (he had this look on his face like he didn't want to do it, but now he had to prove something) he shot me.
I remember looking up at Albert's face and it was in horror, like he didn't know what to do. Then I didn't see him anymore. The guy then shot again and I heard a thud behind me. The guy with the gun was gone all of a sudden and the scene switched to a guy with a red shirt neeled down beside me.
I don't exactly remember after that except that now I knew I was dead and I was walking around the warehouse.
People were still shopping and just going about their business as usual, and I didn't question this.
I went up some guy and touch him, and he knew I was there, but I don't remember who that guy was, it's really hazy, that part.
Then I went up to the guy in the red shirt and took his hand, he was surprised at first, then started freaking out, telling me to leave him alone and go away.
So I went back to the scene where I was shot and Brooke and Jacob were there. They were talking about how they couldn't believe that my baby was shot too. I looked down and there was a little mound lying on the ground.
I was convinced that the other person who had been shot behind me was Albert, but the guy with the gun was lying on the ground dead but he was lying there just bones and clothes and his bones were all moldy. Albert was nowhere to be found. There were crusty thick blood stains on the ground, like it had happened a long time ago.
All of a sudden I turn around from looking at the guy with the gun's corpse and Jacob, Brooke, and my other friend Kristen are playing with what I assume to be "my baby" on the floor.
The scene had shifted to where the baby had never died. I walk over to the baby who is wearing a red full suit pajama outfit and I grab his hands to hold him in sitting position. He is probably about 10 months old or so, having a little trouble sitting by himself. He is looking at me and I hear Kristen say in a sweet voice, like a voice someone uses to talk to a child, "Is your mama here?"
That's all I can remember.
There are many points to reflect on here. I just woke up, literally minutes before typing this, and I wanted to get it out while it was fresh. I will come back to interpret after I have had some time to ponder its implications...and I have taken a pee.</blockquote>
=====Perspective=====
also, something I found interesting was the fact that everyone went on shopping, and this is something that is happening all over the world. These atrocities happen, and people continue distracting themselves because they don't want to look at the horror of it all. I got shot, and then people are shuffling around my body to look at the items on the table, ahhhh, disgusting shit!
also, the guy with the red shirt who was freaking out when i touch him when I was dead. he must have just come from kneeling down beside me, and even he continued to shop, and when I approached him, he had so much fear in his eyes...like this fear of death - he knew it was me, but didn't want to admit it or look at the implication.
this baby thing is interesting as well. in a lot of novels and films there is this notion of death and rebirth. there is either a pregnancy or a birth just after or before someone passes...and all the red clothing - the baby and the guy.
vlog on the experience is here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I4q0fpxWnkQ


=Dream with Self-forgiveness=
=Dream with Self-forgiveness=

Revision as of 18:51, 29 March 2012

Sleeping and Dreaming, what is it?

In this section we give the Destonian perspective on sleeping and dreaming. We outline this perspective from a variety of angles: interdimensional beings, Bernard Poolman's interviews, Sunette, and other Destonians who have contributed to the content of this page.

On Sleeping

Understand the following: That you as a being as 'life essence' as who you are of life does not require sleep and does not sleep - an example of this is interdimensional beings. Anyone ever considered the question: Why human beings sleep but interdimensional beings do not sleep...?

Sleeping is also pre-programmed within and as the mind consciousness system within human beings - when you 'sleep' this is when the mind consciousness system 'regenerates' and'rejuvenates' itself in preparation for 'another day' when you'll be 'actively participating' as a mind consciousness system within this world as the unified consciousness field. Thus, the mind consciousness system will 'while you're asleep' 'dig into' and 'submerge' itself into the subconscious and unconscious mind to allocate memory banks, thoughts, past experiences etc. to merge / rise / install within your conscious mind, so when you participate within your daily 'life experience' you'll have a 'new fresh set of thoughts / thoughts patterns' to pre-occupy you with.

The 'sleep stages' are actually where you submerge you within yourself, while your mind submerges you and takes you 'with it' from the conscious mind, into the subconscious mind straight through to the unconscious mind (your deep sleep), see the mind takes you with it, because it cannot exist without you, and the mind can only take you on this journey through the mind stages to rejuvenate and regenerate when you're 'asleep' so you don't actually know this is really happening. Thus,'sleeping' is an automated constructed system within and as your mind consciousness system to 'keep it going' - to 'keep you going' as a mind consciousness system. This is where dreaming takes place. Dreams were the diversion for human beings to not actually see/experience/understand what really happens when they dream in any way whatsoever. You 'think' you're dreaming but your mind system is actually taking you on its journey through the mind stages into the unconscious mind, to 'dig' and 'search' for thought patterns / behaviors / system alignments from the 'global unconscious as the unified consciousness field', to install [these] within you, to 'implant' within you, to 'pre-occupy' you through another day, and so this continues every evening you sleep - this is the procedure that takes place. Then when you wake up all 'groggy' it's you together with the mind as the mind, rising up from within the unconscious to the subconscious to the conscious, when you're 'awake' you're fully / completely within and as the conscious mind. The reason why the world says 8 - 9 hours sleep is because the entire procedure takes 8 - 9 hours for full completion: installation and implantation of unconscious mind manifestations to be infused within and as your own mind consciousness system.

On Dreaming

Though, what we have done with regards to dreams is the following, instead of you going within and as your own mind journey through the mind stages - we've compressed all three mind stages to one singular point within you as you where we 'brought together everything and all of you to one singular point within the mind as all three mind stages'. Thus, when you sleep, you don't submerge anymore, but is placed within this one singular point, where dreams are inserted which assist and support you within the current point placement of yourself within your process - thus - dreams now assist and support you with regards to where you are in your process currently - the 'point' of you within yourself.

That is why we suggest only 4 - 6 hours sleep, this is all you require, because if you sleep longer than this, you'll move beyond this point placement of you within you and submerge with your mind into the conscious, subconscious and unconscious mind. Thus you giving your mind the opportunity to regenerate and rejuvenate itself by installing and implanting manifestation within you from other human beings in this world through the unconscious mind unified field connection / interconnection - and have experiences / reactions within you - that's not even of you - but believe to be you, then the moment you believe it to be you - you make it your own - and thus so ingrain the reactions/behaviors within and as your own mind consciousness system. 4 - 6 Hours sleep is sufficient - it's all your human physical body requires because then it's not sleep per say - but resting your human physical body for a moment. It will take some diligence to 're-set' yourself to only sleep 4 - 6 hours a day - though each have the will to do this.

Will do the self forgiveness list as well - though - here for the moment diligence and discipline to only sleep for 4 - 6 hours maximum.

Dreams as Reality? Discover yourself in Dreams

Understand that the Dream-Reality is no different to the Physical-Reality, because in both Realities a Being's experience is exactly the same, because the Being exist as the Mind, and experience themselves as and through the Mind within both the Dream-Reality and the Physical-Reality. In essence what I’m stating here is that Beings are not actually really existing in and as the Physical-Reality, we’re existing in the Mind, separate from the Physical. In essence, [we are]always existing within a ‘Dream-World’ of sorts as the Illusions of and as our own Mind. Thus, the Dream-World, in terms of the experience of the Mind as you is the ‘real-Reality’, as the Mind’s own reality of itself as our ‘real-Reality’ –in reality – the Physical do not actually exist for us, all we’re always experiencing is ourselves as and of the Mind [which is] not actually the Physical Here. I, Chief – have taken responsibility for and as the Point of Dreams – finding practical ways/methods with which to utilize Dreams,in assisting and supporting the Being in their Process of Self-Realization as the Physical equal and one Here. (...) Dreams are now directly related to Self and Self alone, and will reflect suppression/secrets/denials/desires etc. as parts of Self that Self has separated Self from to, through Dreams see the Truth of Self directly to from/through Dreams assist and support Self within the Process of Self-Corrective-Action within Self-honest Self-Forgiveness. And stop, stand-up and change/transform Self in every moment of breath as you participate in this world in Walking the Principle of Equality and Oneness as Life.

In this: ‘short-circuiting’ one’s Process so that you don’t have to go through more events/ experiences within your world as manifested-Consequence to be able to see the Truth of you and then only change/Stand-up – which could take weeks, months even years to ‘play-out’ – dependent on the severity of the self-definition as a particular point of Mind.(...) A suggestion, also – is that one do not ‘define Self according to/as dreams’ – otherwise, one will accept and allow self-limitation within that definition. Simply realize/understand that dreams simply reflect/reveal parts of Self that Self has accepted and allowed Self to separate Self from. Thus, it is to investigate the Dream-Self-Revelation self-honestly; change/transform Self in Living-application and Unconditionally let the point as the Dream go. For even within holding onto a dream within Self, hold Self to that dream, enslaved to that dream – then Self cannot move Here – because Self is stuck in/as a Dream-Reality past-memory-Moment. (Transcribed from Bernard Poolman's interview "Dreams as Reality? Discover yourself in Dreams")

Self-Forgiveness

Overview

Dreams: Self Forgiveness of/for Interpretation through Knowledge

Step 1: Whenever you are interpreting – you are using the Mind and you’re using knowledge you already have or things you have already captured through your photographic capturing system called the eyes. Capturing a lot more than what you’re consciously seeing and use that within you interpretations to make sense of your reality.

Unconditional forgiveness is the key – do not try and understand knowledge or interpretations – because you were not present when you captured the images. Therefore – unconditionally let them go – then you look again – unconditional self forgiveness on everything.

When you are structuring your forgiveness in sentences – for instance – I forgive myself that I have allowed myself...then you follow the words in sequence – as you would literally physically rub out or erase the geometrical form of the pictured interpretation. This is done that your forgiveness in words – is actual physical space-time related as you have interpreted and accepted your space-time reality according to the pictures that reflects in your mind as your observations. (posted by Sunette)

On Sleeping

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to believe that I need and must have sufficient sleep otherwise if I don't - I'll be tired

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become dependent on sleep

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to believe that 'lack of sleep' exist - and that if I were to 'lack sleep' - I will be tired

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define 'lack of sleep' to tiredness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to believe that tiredness exist

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that tiredness is an idea / belief designed of the mind, accepted and allowed as 'normal' due to 'lack of sleep'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that sleeping 8 - 9 hours or more is healthy for my human physical body

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define sleeping as healthy

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize, see or understand that sleeping is a system the mind system use to alter / change / update itself - while / during I am unconscious

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use / abuse sleep as an escape from my reality, manipulating the reason and cause for sleeping through 'making it sound acceptable' through believing sleeping 8 - 9 hours or more is healthy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use sleep as a method of hiding from self responsibility and facing myself within and as my reality in every moment as the moment as the breath

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that the body only requires rest for a maximum of 6 hours - and that's it

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that the mind is the directive principle of me - as it has the ability to induce perceptual tiredness, which is the mind consciousness systems' 'signal / sign' that it requires regeneration and rejuvenation - which is done through sleeping 8 - 9 hours or more

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that tiredness and sleep exist within the mind of the mind - it is not who I am

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be directed, influenced and controlled by the mind - through it informing me when it's 'tired', then using me to 'sleep' while it rejuvenates and regenerates and replenishes itself as it takes me on the journey through my subconscious and unconscious mind - to 'allocate' manifestations to pre-occupy me during another day while I'm 'awake'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my mind to use me - I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that abuse exist within self, through accepting and allowing myself to be abused by the mind - and because I accept / allow this within me - I accept / allow this within the rest of the world as me

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that 'sleeping' and 'awake' is also polarity manifestations of the mind - I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that it's the mind that sleeps and it's the mind that wakes up and thus - that I have never really lived

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself realize that the 'normalcy' of sleeping 8 - 9 hours a day is accepted and allowed by all of humanity within and of the unified consciousness field because it's the exact amount of time the mind requires to allocate manifestations within the unconscious mind, then to merge them into the conscious mind as the mind 'wakes' - I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that the manifestations merged into the conscious mind, extracted from the unconscious mind is of the unified consciousness field from other human beings - yet - the moment I believe a thought to be me, as me, - I make such manifestations my own and in this moment - I infuse other human beings' thought patterned behaviors / habits within and as the mind consciousness system that exist within me - and thus such manifestations become me

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that the mind is 'at work' while I 'sleep' - conjuring and gathering manifestations of any and all kinds, extracted from the unconscious mind - to merge into my conscious mind, so I believe that such manifestations to be me, because it exists in my mind - and so the mind consciousness system within me 'upgrades itself' every evening I 'sleep'

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that dreams are used by the mind consciousness system to divert my attention while I sleep to not actually understand / know what's really going on while I sleep - therefore - dreams were meaningless

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that who I am exist as thoughts, feelings and emotions - needing 'lots of sleep' for a 'healthy life'

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that 'lots of sleep' 8 - 9 hours or more - is healthy for the mind consciousness system within me as that which I have accepted and allowed myself to become

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that 'the difficulty of waking up in the mornings' is my emergence as the mind from the unconscious, to the subconscious to the conscious mind - which 'takes a while' - then when I'm 'awake' and 'up' - it's actually me as the conscious mind, actively participating within and of the unified consciousness field

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to define who I am as sleep / sleeping

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to define who I am as tired / tiredness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the pre-occupation and attention diversion of the mind as thoughts/feelings/emotions to not accept or allow myself to experience myself as the breath of life as the moment - here as who I am

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that who I am is the breath as the breath as the moment - here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe/think that if I sleep 'less than' I usually do - I will be tired the next morning - instead of realizing that I am designing the very experience of tiredness in the morning through the perceptual belief/idea that less sleep equals tiredness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the idea/belief of 'less sleep than I usually have' equals tiredness the next morning - which influence the experience of me within and throughout the entire day - instead of remaining here as the breath as me in every moment

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to wake up in the morning as the breath as me as the moment as me

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that it's the mind that struggles to wake up in the mornings - as it merges with me as me from the unconscious mind to the subconscious mind to the conscious mind - where it eventually later 'wakes up' completely

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that in the mornings when I open my eyes and I accept / allow myself to participate in one singular thought - I 'activate' all the workings / findings / manifestations the mind retrieved and obtained within the unconscious mind while I was being pre-occupied through dreams - referred to as sleeping - and then allow / accept all such manifestations to infuse within me as me - and thus become such manifestations as thought patterns and behaviors within and of the unified consciousness field.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that sleeping is literal sleep - the complete submerge of me, as the mind does it's work - because I as who I am is not aware

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that 'awakening' and 'awake' that exist within and of the unified consciousness field - is the 'awake' and 'awakening' of the mind in it's entirety - that it's not to be awake - but to live practically as who I am which is here as the moment as the breath as me - because for 'awake / awakening' to exist - 'sleep / sleeping' must exist - the 'awake/awakening' for the mind of the mind and the 'sleep / sleeping' for me of me, disappearing into the background within myself until I no longer exist and only the mind as what I have accepted and allowed myself to become exist as me.

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that I have always been asleep - the actual sleeping of me as the manifested experience thereof is proof - as the mind exists always, the mind is always active - and thus proof that I have never actually practically lived before as who I am as the breath as the moment as me

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that I have never actually practically lived as who I am as the breath as the moment as me - but that I have always accepted and allowed the mind to control / direct and influence me through believing and perceiving that who I am is thoughts/feelings and emotions

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to separate myself from the human physical body of life - from the breath - not realizing that breath is life as me nurturing the expression and manifestation of life as the human physical body as me - I am breath - I am human physical body - I am here - I am moment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be submerged within and as myself through allowing and accepting myself to be and become the mind consciousness system - because I have believed the lie that I need to be and become the mind consciousness system to survive and exist within and as the unified consciousness field

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become the mind consciousness system - to be of thoughts, feelings and emotions - because it's what and who everyone else has become as those that have gone before me which I have believed and trusted to be 'my example' -instead of realizing I am the unconditional innocence of self expression of life that exist as the moment as the breath of life as me - the simplicity of practical living exist here as the moment as the breath within and as oneness and equality as the human physical body as the manifestation of life as life of me as me

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that I am simplicity

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that I am breath as life of life as me

I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to realize that the very manifestation of creation as me of life within and as oneness and equality is here as the human physical body of the breath of life as me

Practical Dream Assessment

In this section we introduce a number of dreams on a variety of topics from people who are in process and have participate in the forums. The structure of this section alternates between the description of dream and a perspective given as support by one of the members of the group, or by the dreamer him or herself. The dreams are thematically categorized:

On: Body

On: People

On: Animals

On: Death

On: The Elements (Fire, Water, Earth, Air)

On: Human Traits

On: Drugs

Dream with Self-forgiveness

Dream

I dreamed that my brother hit a disabled woman with his car and that he tried to escape his responsibility. I told him that it was unacceptable and that he had to face the consequences. A commotion broke out and people started to fight in the streets completely possessed. My mother jumped into a car and started fighting with a woman, pulling her hair and what not. I pulled them apart and told them that they were demon possessed. I looked into my mothers eyes and I saw her changing between a demon form and her human form and I told her to breathe. I started laughing and became possessed myself making gruesome faces. I felt strangely enough free within this demon expression, but also quite frightened and out of control. I snapped out and took a deep breath in and out, and I said to myself "I have to focus on myself, I can't save my mother". Then I was chased by demons as they recognized me as not being possessed and I tried to hide in abandoned houses.

Forgiveness

So, what the dream told me is most prominently:

  • 1. a fear of becoming possessed
  • 2. a fear that my family members will become possessed
  • 3. a fear of being exposed to and harmed by possessed beings
  • 4. a desire to save my family
  • 5. a desire to become possessed

Self Forgiveness

1. I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear becoming demon possessed I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see/realize that I can't be demon possessed if I don't allow it I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear facing myself as a demon I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to believe that anything can possess me if I stick to breathing I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear losing myself I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to believe that I as physical here-ness can be lost I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear my anger I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to lose myself in anger I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to believe that I deal with my anger if I suppress it I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to suppress my anger instead of forgiving myself I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see/realize that fear is a form of demon possession in itself I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to become possessed with fear of demons I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear myself


2. I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear that my brother will become demon possessed

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear that my mother will become demon possessed I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear that my father will become demon possessed I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear losing my family members within them becoming demon possessed I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear standing alone I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to assume that my brother, mother and father have no self-control I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear facing my mother as a demon I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear facing my father as a demon I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear facing my brother as a demon I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear my brothers anger I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear my fathers anger I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear my mothers anger I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear rinding the car when my brother is driving I forgive myself that I haven't allowed myself to see/realize that my fear is related to memories of my family members road rages and thus lack physical substance


3. I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear getting in the way of a being possessed with anger/hate/rage

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear the anger of others I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to be in a constant alert mode in fear of being hurt by possessed beings in public I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear my neighbor and thus sustaining and maintaining the current system of fear and self-interest


4. I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to want to save my family

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to believe that I can save my family I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear assisting my family within clear and practical common sense because of fear of being ridiculed I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to fear being ridiculed by my family I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to ridicule myself I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to believe that my family is special and worth saving within wanting to save them


5. I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to desire being demon possessed

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to be tempted by the demonic I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to believe that I would be free if I became a demon I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to want to abdicate my responsibility within becoming demon possessed

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